You are enough

A video popped up on my facebook newsfeed the other morning and it could not have been timed more appropriately. Since having baby # 2 I have been working my butt off (literally) to get back to my pre-baby body. I have done this "gain and lose" game before, once before my wedding and again with my first son, but for some reason it has been even more difficult this third time around. 

Here is some background knowledge for you. I am a fitness and dance instructor, my Mom is a nutrition consultant and was previously a body builder. I have a wealth of knowledge regarding food, eating, healthy lifestyle choices, exercise and so on. But for some reason this excess of 11 pounds lingering after my second baby has been the biggest weight loss battle I have faced. It took me less than 6 months to lose just shy of 20 pounds before my wedding and I kept it off until my first baby. It took me 5 months to the day to lose approximately 30 pounds with my first baby. And here we sit, 6 months post partum with my second baby and I hover around the 1 or 2 pounds left to lose. I have tried it all, eating clean, calorie counting, food journaling, the 80/20 rule, the one cheat day a week approach. I do cardio EVERY day, I weight lift, I take classes, I run. You name it, I do it, but for some reason my body has changed. It started to get to the point of obsession. I would weigh myself before and after meals, first thing in the morning and last thing before bed. I took my scale with me on vacations. My husband and friends made jokes about it but I justified it by saying "seeing the number keeps my eating on track". 

But the truth is, no, it didn't. It kept me obsessed with my weight. Many times when I should have taken a nap or a even just sat and had a coffee I raced downstairs to my home gym and got in an hour workout while my kids slept. I got up 2 hours before my kids so I could get a workout in before they woke up. My weight was consuming my life. Over the weekend I had a complete breakdown and called my mom (moms always know best). I cried to her about how frustrated I was that no matter how hard I worked I wasn't getting to where I wanted to be. I wasn't enjoying food and time with friends and family. I was missing moments with my sweet babies because I was so consumed in a battle with myself regarding food and my weight. It had taken over my life. I have never been one to resort to unhealthy weight loss options but from a mental perspective I was almost at the point of an eating disorder. I decided it was enough. I gave my scale to my husband and told him to hide it. I went through my closet and packed away any clothes that didn't currently fit. But most importantly I told myself, I love you and you look beautiful. Not in a conceited way. In a truthful and loving way. I am enough, and I am more beautiful than I give myself credit for. 

I have stretch marks, and cellulite and varicose veins. But guess what, I also have beautiful eyes, strong and muscular legs and a big heart. I am a mother of two little boys that are still in diapers. I have my whole life to work on my body but for right now I want to work on my mind. I want to be a role model for my children, my dance students, my friends and other mommy's. 

You are enough and you are more beautiful than you think!

Eat Clean Train Mean

Baby Ashe is 8 weeks old this Thursday and it's time to get back on track. I have 11 pounds of "baby weight" to shed ASAP. In order to do so, priority number one is getting back to clean eating. This includes healthy choices, portion control and food prep.  The next focus is fitness. Back to running, lifting weights and being active! I always love getting back at it. I am getting more sleep now that Ashe is going longer over night so I am ready to get active! 

My new meal plans look like this:

Breakfast

Oatmeal with berries and chia seeds

coffee with sweetener and almond milk

Snack 1

apple, 1 light baby bell cheese, small bag of mixed nuts 

Lunch

2 egg white muffin tin omelettes with turkey bacon, peppers, tomato and cheese, side of cucumber and avocado 

Snack 2

two rice cakes with almond butter

Dinner

chicken stir fry with peppers, zucchini, broccoli, onion, carrots. 

brown rice 

Post Workout

Protein shake with greek yogurt, frozen berries, banana, spinach, flaxseed, unsweetened almond milk, ice, 1 scoop of whey protein.

Some recipes for other healthy snacks

Protein Cookies

1 1/2 – 2 cups of Oats
2 Ripe Bananas
1 cup of All Natural Unsweetened Apple Sauce
1/3 cup of Unsweetened Dried Cranberries
(Or any other kinds of dried fruit.. Raisins, Cranberries, Dates, Goji Berries, etc.) 
2 tsp of Cinnamon2 or 3 Egg Whites
5 tbsp of Protein Powder
1 cup of sweetener 
Step One: In a large bowl, mash up your Bananas – preferably no lumps.
Step Two: Mix in the Apple Sauce. Then add your Egg Whites. Mix well.
Step Three: Add in your Cinnamon, Protein Powder, and Dried Cranberries.
Step Four: Preheat Oven to 350°
Step Five: Spoon mixture onto a parchment paper lined cookie sheet.
Step Six: Bake 12-18 minutes

Banana Chocolate Protein Bars
Ingredients:
1 cup old fashioned rolled oats
1 cup oat flour
1/3 cup protein powder 
1 T chia seeds (optional)
1 t cinnamon
pinch of sea salt
2 medium ripe bananas, mashed
3 egg whites
1/2 cup unsweetened vanilla almond milk
2 T smooth natural peanut butter (or almond butter)
1/2 T honey
5 drops of liquid stevia (or 1 T more of honey)
1 t vanilla
1/4 cup chocolate chips

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350° F.
In a bowl combine all dry ingredients: oats, oat flour, protein powder, chia seeds, cinnamon, and salt.
In a large bowl combine all wet ingredients: bananas, egg whites, almond milk, peanut butter, honey, liquid stevia, and vanilla.
Slowly pour and stir the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients until everything is well mixed, then gently stir in the carob chips.
Pour the batter into a greased 8 x 5 in. or 8 x 8 in. baking dish.
Bake for 15-20 minutes; remove from oven and cool for 15-20 minutes.
Cut into 8 squares and enjoy.

Mud Hero

Mud Hero Obstacle Course Run

6 km course

15 natural and man made obstacles

Clean and beautiful before the race

Some muddy best buddies

Our Mud Hero team

Sinister 7

                                             Sinister 7 Ultra Marathon + Relay

148km course 

5,250m elevation gain 

27 hours

7 Wonderz the day before the race

7 Wonderz at the Start Line

7 Wonderz at the Finish Line

Mom and I after I completed leg 1

Mom and I after she completed leg 3

Training Weekend

This past weekend we had a training weekend for our ultramarathon coming up in a few weeks. The race takes place in the Crowsnest Pass so we spent the weekend in Canmore hiking two mountains to prepare for the change in altitude and the hiking conditions that the race will present. It was a big weekend for training but also a big weekend because it was my first time away from Al for more than 24 hours. Daddy did a great job and everyone survived but it definitely marked a milestone. I have spent today trying to take care of the tornado that must have hit the house while I was gone but at least my little guy is in one piece (with only a few scratches).  Only five members of our team were able to make it this weekend but it still proved to be a good team bonding experience. There was definitely a wide variety in our group of age, athletic ability, relationships to one another, and maybe even sense of humour? But it proved that under stressful (mental and physical) conditions we are still a great team and group of friends / mother-daughters. We did two scramble hikes: Lady MacDonald and China Man's Peak. Here are some pictures from our hiking trip, Enjoy!

And just a side note, I haven't picked up my point and shoot camera in quite a while now, and boy can I tell the difference. My DSLR was just too much to carry up the mountain and sadly I think I missed out on some great shots! But these pictures are still great memories captured on the ol' pink Canon!

Back on Track

I've been stuck at a plateau on the scale since we returned home from Mexico( Yes almost 4 months ago). Part of it was due to a lack of motivation because I was satisfied with my body. I wouldn't say I was overjoyed but I had reached a point that was "good enough". The other part was that I was enjoying having a break from being super strict with my diet. I wasn't gaining any weight but I wasn't losing any either. I had climbed up about 5 pounds from Christmas to the return of our trip to Mexico and I just really wanted to see that number on the scale 5 pounds less. Crazy that I had lost 57 pounds but just couldn't commit to 5 more. But, a friend at bootcamp had shared a little secret with me and it got me inspired again. She has been on an incredible weight-loss journey and I really admire her for the hard work she has put in! She told me that she had been stuck a certain number on the scale and had even gained a few pounds when she told her self enough is enough time to get back on track! And she did, she beat that plateau and is continuing to lose weight! What was I waiting for? I can do this, and she pushed me to get back on track.


I have been training so hard for my ultra marathon in July and putting exponential demands on my body, how can I expect it to perform under this kind of stress without fuelling it properly?! So I decided to seek out nutritional services (even though I have done it without the help before) and get some accountability for my diet*. I found out there were some things I needed to focus on to get back on track. To help me with these healthy choices I planned  ahead. I packed all kinds of snacks and pre made to-go bags of healthy choices for on the run and even when I am at home. It is so easy to grab a bag of chips or candies while you are sitting at home with the little one playing. Before you know it the entire bag is gone and you now have 300+ calories to burn off. Yikes! So I packed carrots, pre cut apples, cheese strings, containers of cottage cheese, hard boiled eggs (shelled and sliced), rice cakes, rice crackers, bell peppers and more.  It has only been 4 days and already I find I am not craving the sugary treats, and now reaching for the bell peppers and hummus or apples and peanut butter. Now that Alexander is eating more and more, why would I not want to model good eating habits for him to pick up on?! I am just so excited about eating right and feeling great! Ive also increased my water consumption (which has also increased my bathroom trips) and started a food journal to keep track of what I am eating. Until I can be honest with myself and make responsible decisions I am going to write down what I eat to show myself how to stay on track! 

Carrot sticks and Apples

Rice cakes, Rice crackers and 90 cal granola bars

Premade fruit & yogurt smoothies
(with protein powder and ground flax seed)

On top of the eating, I have been going hard with the training to prepare for the race in July. We are 8 weeks out from race weekend and have started alot of extra training. We are running hills and stairs to prepare for the moutain-ess terrain we will be running in. I love this kind of training because it is something so foreign to the body and brings the pain! I love it! On top of that we have registered for the Mud Hero obstacle race in Calgary at the end of July and i cannot wait! It is a 6km route with 14 obstacles along the way! It should be a blast!

Anyway just wanted to share my food journey with you all and let you know you can do it! Wether it is 50 pounds or 5 it really is a lifestyle you must adapt. Why wouldn't you want to eat right?

* When I say diet I do not mean a Body by Vi or Atkins type of diet, I am talking about my overall food intake and what I choose to put in my body for fuel. Not a temporary thing but my permanent way of eating. 

Finish Line

Last week I completed one of my goals that I set for myself last fall. I completed a 20km run! It wasn't a race and didn't count for any special recognition but it was a goal I had set and I am happy to say I completed it. I started running because it was something I could do with Alexander to get back in shape after having him. It can be hard to find time to work out but I found that since I could bring him with me it wasn't as hard to get a quick 30 min run in. That turned into an hour and it just kept progressing from there. Now my training is focused toward my ultra marathon in July where I will be running a 16km leg of the race, through the mountains. It's really amazing to see how far I have come.


My very dear friend has also completed a goal and a huge achievement that I am so proud of her for! She ran her first half marathon last weekend!  I think it is so cool that she was able to do this race, because last September the two of us could barley huff through 5km without having to stop and walk and catch our breath. Its a true testament to how far we have come! So proud of her!

The cheer squad 

Crossing the finish line

The Superstar herself!

Share the Road

Spring has arrived and that means it is time to share the road again. I will be the first to admit that the cyclists that emerge as the snow melts often annoy me. But since taking up running I have found that a nice outdoor run can make a 16 km trek feel a lot better than 60 some laps around a track at millennium place. That being said it is a little hard to make a 16km path through my 3 km subdivision and I have been forced to take to the range roads. We don't have the luxury of sidewalks or bike/running paths out in the country so I resort to the shoulders of said range roads. What I have also realized about running outside is that 10, 12 or even 20 km is a lot farther than you would think. The route you have to map out to accomplish these distances are a lot longer than you would think and I now can see why some cyclists are forced to take to the roads in order to get routes in that accommodate their distance requirements. So here I am faced with a dilemma. For once I actually feel sorry for the cyclists who are stuck, having to bike on roads with little sympathy or consideration from drivers. Especially outside the city where our options are very limited. So I suggest the following compromise: Cyclists and runners, single file and stick to roads with as wide of shoulders as possible (this eliminates baseline road east of sherwood park). Take to the ditch when necessary and respect that you are on a road. Drivers, respect that we are exhausting all options by running or biking on the road. We don't want to be on these shoulders anymore than you want us there. But, give us a little courtesy and slow down or go around us when possible (no oncoming traffic) it makes a huge difference for us, the sideliner. And lets face it, if we crash, you will be fine, we will probably not make it. So that being said lets share the road, safely. I never thought I would be an advocate for the road bikers/runners but now that I have had my own eye opening experience I can see both sides a little more clearly and openly. 

Happy Spring

All fixed up

It's here! The desktop arrived on Valentines Day, along with Appletv (which Sandy loved). I took the laptop in that day and had her all fixed up! The computer man explained the fixing up to me in laymen's terms: the "car" can now fit more people (hard drive), go faster (RAM) and won't turn off unexpectedly (new battery). Delightful, now it can be passed off to Sandy and the big desktop is all mine! Hehehe The only thing I need to figure out now is how to transfer all my music and photo's. Speaking of which I installed lightroom on the desktop so now I have a new project to conquer. Add it to the list, along with figure out the sewing machine, baby book, photo books, figuring out what we need for our new trailer! Just so many fun and exciting things happening.


We purchased our trailer last weekend when the RV show was in town. Not that it was a hard decision, we basically already knew what we wanted, but now it's an official done deal. We get it in March or April and I can not wait to take our little family camping. Those are for sure the best memories of childhood: camping! 

I've been back to running, getting on track for my upcoming races (haha literally). I entered in a 10 km race in March to get my first race out of the way. I think I may be a bit nervous so I don't want it to be an important race like the one we have in July. I've also been busy getting ready for my two year observation for my fitness instructing! I can't believe it has been two years already. Never-the-less I've been reviewing, doing up class plans and booking my CPR course. 

We are starting to baby-proof the house as well, outlet covers, baby gates, and cupboard lockers. It's only a matter of time before our little monster will be on the go so I wanted to get the house safe and sound ahead of time. Anyway that is about all for now as I hear him waking up from his afternoon nap. 

Computer down

Sorry friends it's been a few weeks! We have a problem with the computer. It's if full, and I mean completely full! I need to have more ram and hard drive space put on it but before I can do that I have to back it up and before I can back it up I needed an external Hard drive,which apple was sold out of. So it finally arrived in the mail this week, I am backing it up tonight and will hopefully be taking it in next week to get more room on the old boy! For now I've been using the iPad which makes blogging a little challenging! And on top of all this I have orderd a desktop for our little family so we surely won't run out of room anytime soon! ( even with the amount of pictures I take) so now that I have explained myself I can tell you what we've been up to!

Our biggest change as of late is that we have switched to the bottle. I think it was harder on me than it was on Alexander but what's done is done! Despite a few very horrible attempts before this, it went pretty well! Otherwise we've been sitting, eating all kinds of food, and growing! Al gained a full pound in a week!

I have finally finished my photography course that I started last May/June. I am oping to take a class on my photoshop program and continue to work on my photography. I am also working in receritifying my fitness certification which will be all taken care of by e end of February. On top of that I hoping to figure out my new sewing maching. Busy busy. Still training for the ultra marathon in July and I have my first race (a 10km run) in March.

Sandy and I are off the RV show this weekend to pick out our trailer, merry Christmas to us! And then we will have our date night. First one since December, I'm really looking forward to it! Mother exciting weekend coming up is a Toms "style your sole party" next weekend. A fellow blogger posted about it and I decided to join in on the fun! I can't wait to see how they turn out!

Lastly I made a very delicious soup today that a few people have requested the recipe for so here goes:
Ingredients:
30 oz of shredded frozen Hash browns
3 cans of chicken broth
1 can of cream of chicken soup
1/2 cup onion chopped
1/4tsp pepper
1pavkage of cream cheese ( don't use fat free it won't melt)

Garnishes:
Sour cream
Cheddar cheese
Bacons bits
Chives

In crockpot combine all ingredients except cream cheese. Cook on low for 6-8 hours. 1 hour before serving add cream cheese and cook on low until cream cheese is thoroughly dissolved. Serve with garnishes! It's really complicated I know! Enjoy!

Christmas is Coming

Christmas Cards have arrived! I can't wait to get them out, they are too cute this year. We used pictures from our family photo session with Jessica at Vintage Duck Photography and I put together the cards through iphoto on my mac. I forced Sandy into helping me stuff envelopes, while I labelled! I am happy to report I am almost finished Christmas shopping. Thank goodness because I'd really like to bake and relax and enjoy my Christmas time. Next on the agenda, getting ready for Sandy's 30th birthday. In a week and a half we will be celebrating his big 3-0 and I have quite the party planned. The best part, a custom cake. I can't wait to see how it turns out! After that shindig it will be on to Mom-Daughter dinner, Christmas party's, baking and gingerbread decorating, Christmas, and my birthday. And only a few days later we will be jetting off to Mexico. It is all happening so fast!

I've been looking into activities for Al and I to do, come January. We really enjoyed strollercize and swimming lessons the past few months but we will be trying a few new things after Christmas. There are so many fun classes to choose from but at the risk of over-stimulating my baby I will have to narrow it down. Right now we are deciding between a gymnastics program, a baby class (songs and actions), strollercize,and Salsa mama class. We will have to see what ends up happening!

On top of all that I am training for Sinister 7, an ultramarathon that my "friend" suggested we try. I use the term loosely as I think this is going to be very challenging. I am definitely kidding and I think it will be a great experience but it is going to mean some serious training. I have already worked my way up to 10km which is a great accomplishment, but I will have to continue pushing as my leg of the race is 16 km itself! Running, combined with bootcamp and strollercize, I have definitely been getting closer to my pre-baby weight goal. I am down 51 lbs in 4 months, and I only have 6 lbs left! I am definitely feeling ready to rock a bikini in Mexico! 

Anyway I am up way too late, for the third night in a row. Time to catch some Z's because Al will be up before I know it!

Sweet Dreams all

18 to go

Well I am officially down 39 pounds since having Alexander, and only 18 more to go! That's right , that means I gained 57 pounds with this boy! But that's not what's important. What is important is that I'm getting it all off before the next pregnancy, and I won't make the same mistakes (ice cream) during my next one! Ive been doing bootcamp twice a week, strollercize twice a week, running and working out downstairs in our home gym. I'm normally not much of a runner but I've really started to get into it! I did my first 7km run today in 56 minutes, with a stroller. Not bad if I do say so. There is also the healthy eating, but today was cheat day and I have enjoyed me some treats! I am really careful with my diet all week but on Saturdays I let loose. I find this is the best weight loss method, as it helps me stay on track 90% of the week. 

We have officially started working on Christmas gifts, the homemade ones at least! But I won't say too much as I don't know who is reading and I don't want to spoil the surprise! Only 10 weeks until Christmas! Sandy and I are hoping to buy a trailer this year for Christmas so we won't be doing gifts but Im hoping to surprise him with a few homemade creations! That also means only 11 weeks until we head to Mexico for Ky's wedding! Can't wait. Daddy spent the day putting up Christmas lights, our house/yard is going to look like a Christmas wonderland this year! While Dad did that we attempted some hand and foot prints for our baby book... fail! There is paint everywhere! But it's still cute so we will save them!

Great Grandma is coming up to visit for a few days so she will be here tomorrow. We also need to visit Aunty Elyse since she just got her wisdom teeth out. I didn't want to tell her this before but I would definitely consider child birth better than wisdom tooth removal. There is no prize when you get those puppies removed! But hopefully she has a quick recovery! Anyway it is pizza night so off we go to enjoy the last few hours of "cheat" day! Have a good weekend all!

Oh and Happy First Birthday to Chevy!!

October

October you are here! Time to decorate for Halloween, switch the shoe shelf from flip flops to boots, pull out the coats, sweaters, and jackets and wish Chevy a Happy Birthday! Fall is here, along with fog and some chilly weather!  We've been working really hard on our mission, only 13 weeks to go and down 35lbs! I can't wait to wear my jeans (among other things) again! I've been working hard at bootcamp, strollercize, on the cross trainer and running outdoors. I'm also trying to get everyone else motivated for the trip! Speaking of trip, this wedding is getting closer and closer! Last weekend we got to work dyeing our bridesmaid dresses and despite my apprehension I'd say they turned out pretty good! 

Of course, I'm purple!

Now all that's left is a bridal shower and stagette part 2. Should be fun! Other than that it's time to start thinking about Christmas gifts (especially the home made ones) I think that's about all I have to say today, time to wake this baby from his nap and feed him! We'll probably cuddle up on the couch for the afternoon until our visitors get here tonight for Taco Tuesday! YUM YUM!

Sleep

Well only a week ago, Alexander slept his first 6 hours. What a treat! I was hoping we were onto a new sleep schedule. Well we were but not the one I had hoped for. For the next 4 days he slept like a newborn, up every 2 to 3 hours. Exhausting. But we had a break through, on Tuesday night he slept 7 hours! For the first time I actually woke up before he did. I even checked to make sure he was still breathing! And again last night we had a 6 hour night! I am loving this. I don't want to get to hopeful though, or I will be disappointed when he decides to have another "up all night" night. 


I now officially have 15 weeks to get 30 lbs of baby weight off! Yikes, crunch time (literally), I've been hitting the gym hard with bootcamp twice a week, strollercize once a week, and the good ol' basement gym the other three days. And on the seventh day she rested! Anyway it can't just be calories out, I have to be mindful of calories in too! It's been challenging but I am cracking down on what I am eating. I am determined to wear a bikini for this Mexican vacation. 

Goal weight!